Tuesday, August 02, 2005

 

Australia - Officially Shit Hot.

Have you patted yourself in the back recently? Have you splurged on a celebratory glass of champagne? If not then you should, because you are bloody fantastic, and so am I.

We’re all fantastic, because we’re all Aussies. Today The Herald Sun, Australia’s most fantastic newspaper tells you what you’ve known in your heart for a long time, but were just to damn self-deprecating to say out loud. We Aussies are the absolute top of the heap, best thing since sliced bread, and everybody’s talking about it except us.

A survey conducted by marketing and brand consultancy firm Anholt-GMI places Australia at NUMBER ONE in the nations brand index. We are absolutely loved by everybody, and why not indeed?

Canada comes in at 2nd, but in a contest like this you’re either first or you’re nowhere, and we are first, and its all thanks to you (and me), because where would Australia be on this list if it wasn’t for the Aussies hey?

Cop this will ya? Direct from the report:

The strength of Australia’s brand derives from an almost universal admiration of its people, landscapes and living and working environment.

"Almost universal admiration". You simply can’t get better than that, and it’s a credit to you that you’ve handled yourself with such good grace. There’d be plenty of others that’d let it go to their heads, but not you (or me).

So next time you see an American blabbing on about God’s own country, about how they’re so damn fan-bloody-tastic, just smile knowingly to yourself, in that much loved laconic Aussie way, and turn to them and quietly whisper. “Eleventh hey?, Fucken loser!”. They'll thank you for it.

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