Rex in the City

A group of so-called Visual Performance Artist from Perth. (read lefto pinko homo) has been endangering the lives of innocent Melbournians and the sanity of their unwitting audience by blurring the distinction between Terror and Art.

This group of deranged dramatists, who call themselves “pvi”, somehow take their customers into their confidence, a phenomenon known as the ‘Stockholm Syndrome’, and lead them on a nightmare bus tour of the less gentrified of Melbourne’s inner suburbs.

They’re apparently trying to make some point:

“We’ve grappled with the concept of fear as a method of social control, a mechanism that gets us to behave in certain ways,” says pvi member Kelli McCluskey.

It is claimed they commence their tour from a dark Collingwood street, whereupon they are sucked into a bizarre parallel world that mingles tour-guide kitsch with military recruitment tactics, multimedia hoodoo and a dash of paranoia.

Fear, they claim, makes people pliable. Well I can tell you, I’m shit scared. But I’m no-ones bunny. I’m scared of these moronic manipulators of Melbourne’s emotional state.

We’re barely holding it together as it is as the moment, without these deranged deviants, these art-school arseholes, stoking the fires of panic.

I cite as evidence Andrew Bolt’s incisive observation relating to the recent panic at Melbourne Airport, where so many people were hospitalised for a mysterious and sudden illness. Mr Bolt correctly diagnosed mass hysteria. He lays the cause of this phenomenon at the feet of the greenies. But it goes much further than that I’m afraid. It is the artists as well. But most of all it is the children.

Children you see have been terrorising the teachers in our schools, as reported in yesterdays Herald Sun (Australia’s most popular newspaper). No-one though ever reports what’s happening in the home. These Terror-Tubbies return from school, not to be greeted with milk and cookies as in the past, but to be greeted by their parents, hiding behind a barricade of chairs in the living room while their children continue their rampage at home.

It’s no wonder that we adults are feeling fragile, under the continuing bombardment of horrific news that The Heralds Sun brings us daily, and the insanity that is going on in the home front, we don’t need the added pressure of some group of cynical sandgropers putting doubts in our mind, questioning our fundamental beliefs.

After all. The only thing we have to feel is fear itself.