Monday, April 11, 2005


Going for the Big One

Its snuggle up time ladies and gentlemen. Time to get to know your neighbour because you’ll be seeing a lot more of them and a lot closer up as well.

That’s because as Australia’s Favourite Newspaper the Herald Sun reports, Premier Bracks has announced that he wants to see Melbourne as Australia’s largest city.

Ever since plans to have the worlds tallest building constructed in the reclaimed Docklands Area were scrapped, Melbourne has been looking around for a new record to break, and now its been settled. We’re going to first go for the National Titles, and then who knows after that? Maybe the Southern Hemisphere, and then the World.

Even going for the Southern Hemisphere record presents we Melbournians with a challenge. With cities like Buenos Aires (11,928,400) , São Paulo (10,260,100) and Jakarta (8,987,800) among the world top ten most populous cities, the Southern Hemisphere claim is not the usual empty record. It’s a serious stretch goal, and I urge all Melbournians to get on board with this exciting challenge.

We’ve got a lot of work to do, but!

With our population currently only running at 3,203,088, even if we took the entire Australian migration intake of 120,000 per year, It’d take us 48 years to catch up to our closest rival, Jakarta. 48 years? Who can wait that long in this era of instant push-button satisfaction? If we’re going to do this we need to get serious. We need to start planning now.

Future Prime Minister Bill Shorten, has a solution of sorts. He says we need to increase the migrant intake to 250,000. Now, Bill, I don’t know if you did maths at school, but that still only brings us into title contention with São Paulo in 35 years. You’re going to have to show a little more imagination than that if you want my vote fella!

Mumbai: Worlds best practice transport Posted by Hello

We need to have a Minister for Overpopulation. We need start now with the study tours to the centres of World Best Practice. Shanghai and Mumbai. We need to go to these places and see how they do it. We need to take a look at their Transport Infrastructure and Housing Infrastructure and discard these ridiculous Melbourne 2030 notions that try to constrain our growth with Green Belts.

We've got the support of great Australians in this including Mr. Murdoch, Mr. Packer and Mr. Harvey of Harvey-Norman fame, so start subdividing my friends. Think. Do you really need that back yard? Consider purchasing a new double-decker sofa. Ask yourself if you and your family can squeeze into one bedroom and offer the others up to our new friends like Mr Bracks has done.

Mr. Bracks in his living room Posted by Hello

C’mon Melbourne. Think Big.

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